Time For A Change! Don Garber Is Killing Major League Soccer!
September 21, 2016
Football, or soccer as the heathens call it, is growing in America, but is the United States ready for the exponential growth that is about to occur? The answer is no.
Last week, MLS commissioner Don Garber discussed expansion plans for the league. Next year, Atlanta United FC and Minnesota United FC will find themselves in the MLS as the newest expansion clubs bringing the total number of MLS teams to 23 teams.
5 wrestlers who could be footballers
GK – The Big Show
This one is fairly self explanatory. The Big Show aka Paul Wight is a former WWE, WCW and ECW Champion and he's been wrestling for over 20 years now. Oh, and he's absolutely massive.
The 7-foot tall giant is a force to be reckoned with, and if you stick him between those two posts there isn't much that's going to get past him. He's even got a sporting history in basketball, so I'm sure he'd be fine with stopping a 25-yard free kick from curling into the top corner.
Also, if you're a referee, how on earth are you planning on telling the big man if he'd conceded a penalty or handled outside of the box? You aren't going to do it, plain and simple. He would quite literally obliterate you.
CB – John Cena
"You can't see me" may be his trademark in the WWE, but on a football pitch he'd be nothing short of a tank. The 15-time world champion is a winner by nature, and he'd be the ideal captain; a centre-back who gets stuck in and doesn't give strikers a moments peace.
If his promos in the wrestling business are anything to go by, he'd also give a pretty damn inspiring half-time team talk if his side were 1-0 down in a cup final. The manager doesn't even need to be there - just let 'Big Match John' do all the work.
He'd never get a yellow or red card either. One of his mantras is "Rise Above Hate", so there's going to be nothing but clean challenges from the commanding defender.
CM – Rhyno
Sweet jesus nobody is going to mess with Rhyno. In the middle of the park he would run down anyone who thinks they can move the ball around, completely halting any momentum they have. Sure, there would be the occasional sending off to contend with, but it'd be worth it for the message he'd send. Think of a bigger, meaner Vinnie Jones.
The hardcore legend is a current WWE Tag Team Champion and is also standing for election in his home state of Michigan, showing that he's got the brains aswell as the brawn.
Any team that discovers they're playing against Rhyno will soon find their best players feigning injury in order to avoid the god awful fate of a two footed challenge from the big man. He'd be the definition of effective.
RW – Neville
An Englishman by nature, Neville is already familiar with the beautiful game as he's an avid supporter of Newcastle United - but we won't hold that against him.
The 30-year-old's quick feet and strength on the ball would make him a nightmare for defences to deal with, and if he endures a tough tackle or two he can more than handle himself in a scrap.
Whether or not he can actually whip a decent cross into the box is a different matter entirely, so long as he goes down dramatically and wins a free-kick all is well.
With so much potential he'd probably end up being one of those players who moves from club-to-club like a mad man, but he sure would be a fun little player to watch - we use the term little very loosely.
Source: Inside Pulse
ST – Kalisto
The former United States champion would more than likely fall into the Javier Hernandez mould if he ever transitioned into the world of football. He's small, irritating and he'd generally just get in the way.
There's no shame in being a poacher when you're an international striker, and Kalisto would fill that role nicely. You'd think the danger has been cleared and then he'd pop up at the back post with a tap in from two yards out.
The back four would often try to hack him down in order to stop him, but they'd fail miserably as he comes and goes at the speed of light. To your own side he would be a hero, but to others he'd be your worst nightmares.
Source: Live HD Wallpaper
Regarding the ideas for expansion of the league, Garber said:
I go to sleep at night continually thinking that we should not make the mistakes of the [original] NASL or other leagues that have expanded too quickly. It would be a shame to take our eye off the ball. But I don’t think we’re at that point yet. It’s 28 teams for us. We’re a long way from 28.
There will be 28 goddamn teams and there’s still a playoff system? This isn’t the NBA or NFL, Garber.
Americans think that the only way to settle things is through a playoff system and that a league table is a bunch of bullshit and backwards. Football can’t be treated like any other sport, Europe does footy right and the model for the league should be copied.
The US already has four leagues of football with the MLS, NASL, USL, and PDL levels of play, but are for the most part disconnected and are owned and operated by separate entities. Having leagues compete will deplete the talent and force the top division (MLS) to suffer as a result.
Don’t get me wrong, the fact that football is growing in this country makes me happier than Rooney at an all-you-can-eat buffet, but we need to be smart about the expansion and the formatting of the league or else we will get left behind.
A relegation/promotion system is the way a football league should be managed that inspires teams to actually get better and be active in the transfer market rather than be average and still have an opportunity to win the MLS Cup. Let the magic live in the US Open Cup, consistency wins league titles.
This past weekend, FC Cincinnati broke all sorts of attendance records in the USL showing the potential of a football market in the city. Unfortunately, there are dozens of cities that are football crazy across the country that won’t get the chance to enter into the MLS market because there are only a limited number of invitations to the party.
Once the invites are sent, USL teams that wanted to make the jump have nowhere to go but to stay in the same division with hopes and dreams of making the jump to the big leagues.
To hell with this country by trying to Americanize the world’s game, it’s egotistical and frankly stupid. The way the game is structured shouldn’t be fucked with and needs to be respected.
Oh, another thing. The fact that the season runs from March to December is bullshit and it only screws with the national team. If anything, make changes for your country, Garber.
America needs help and it isn’t coming anytime soon.