England’s best uncapped XI highlights the struggles the Three Lions face
March 1, 2017
Rumour has it, that you’re never more than six-feet away from a former England international, such is the carefree nature in which the Three Lions award caps.
No doubt that the likes of Carlton Palmer, Steve Guppy and Danny Mills meet every third Wednesday of the month, at the local Bridge club, wearing nothing but their England caps for a good ol’ reminisce.
Despite England’s managers casting their net far and wide, and having a very low criteria in what is worthy of international recognition, there’s still a few that slip through the cracks.
Here’s England’s currently playing uncapped XI:
GK – Jordan Pickford – Sunderland
You know Jermain Defoe? Well he isn't Sunderland's Player of the Season, it's the man between the sticks. Image Source: Twitter
CB – Ben Gibson – Middlesbrough
The Boro centre-back's biggest crime is playing for Middlesbrough, as no England manager visits the Riverside. Image Source: Twitter
CB – Harry Maguire – Hull City Ashley Barnes Burnley
Mikey Blumberg from Recess in real life. Just not as good at poetry, but a lot better at football. Image Source: Twitter
CB – Michael Keane – Burnley
Manchester United want him back and Chelsea are Keane on him. Enough said. Image Source: Twitter
RWB – Michail Antonio – West Ham
Has made England squads in the past, but not made it onto the pitch. But that's understandable, given that he was the highest scoring Englishman in the Premier League, at the time... Image Source: Twitter
LWB – Charlie Daniels – Bournemouth
Sounds and looks like a Football Manager regen. But the Englishman can provide good cover to Danny Rose as a marauding left-back. Image Source: Twitter
CDM – James Ward-Prowse – Southampton
An ever-present for England's Under 21s and Southampton. It's now time for a cap or two. Image Source: Twitter
RW – Nathan Redmond – Southampton
The Theo Walcott, Kieran Gibbs and Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain factory line has been churning them out at an alarming rate, lately. Image Source: Twitter
CAM – Troy Deeney – Watford
Made Marvin Sordell, Odion Ighalo and Matej Vydra all look like good players. That's no easy task. Image Source: Twitter
LW – Demarai Gray – Leicester City
Rumours that Ahmed Musa's inclusion over Demarai Gray against Sevilla was the straw that broke the camel's back for Ranieri's tenure. The winger has got to be special if his teammates want him playing in the biggest night of their career, right? Image Source: Twitter
ST – Charlie Austin – Southampton
Why the former QPR man doesn't have a cap on the mantlepiece yet is baffling. Image Source: Twitter
Lee Grant – Stoke City
And now for the honourable mentions... Going to a Premier League club on loan, from a Championship side, at the age of 33, feels like Grant is doing football wrong. However, the former Derby County 'keeper is one of the signings of the season. Image Source: Twitter
Jason Puncheon – Crystal Palace
Feels like one of those players who probably should've had a cap by now. Handy player for all fantasy football managers, and maybe Gareth Southgate? Image Source: Twitter
Steve Cook – Bournemouth
To still be earning plaudits in a defence trained by Eddie Howe is seriously impressive. Image Source: Twitter
George Friend – Middlesbrough
You've got a Friend in George. But you haven't got an England cap. Image Source: Twitter
Joel Ward – Crystal Palace
One of those unfashionable players who it isn't 'cool' to rate or call-up to an England squad. Image Source: Twitter
Junior Stanislas – Bournemouth
Surely worthy of a place at someone like Everton? Perhaps such a move would earn Three Lions recognition? Image Source: Twitter
Scott Dann – Crystal Palace
Been awhile since England had a goalscoring defender. Image Source: Twitter
James Tomkins – Crystal Palace
Would be highly amusing if JT got an England cap after leaving West Ham. Those Irons would have a meltdown. Image Source: Twitter
Kieran Trippier – Tottenham Hotspur
Game time has been limited at Spurs, however, the defender has been the only back-up along the back line for the Lilywhites that has looked remotely reliable when called upon. Image Source: Twitter
Marc Albrighton – Leicester City
The guy was a key part in Leicester City winning the Premier League title. What else can he do?! Image Source: Twitter
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Must admit, we are already very excited by the amount of unwarranted offence and disgust you lot will find with this. But as long as you can hide behind your keyboards and use the classic David Haye line of: “your mum”, then you carry on as you see fit.
And no, West Ham fans, Mark Noble isn’t ‘missing’ or better than any of the midfielder selected. The Hammers centre-mid was considered for the XI but then common sense and a footballing brain kicked in.
Overall, though, if this is basically England’s ‘B team’ you can see why the Three Lions’ greatest achievement since 1966 is John Barnes rapping.