CONFIRMED: Legendary Keeper Tim Howard Signs With Colorado Rapids In MLS

tim howard terrorist

Multiple sources are linking radical Islamist preacher USMNT goalie Tim Howard with a transfer from Everton to the Colorado Rapids.

Howard took a yearlong hiatus from international play after the 2014 World Cup to spend time with family. If anyone earned a break, it was him.

If there was any doubt, Howard himself took to Twitter today to confirm the news.

His play singlehandedly kept an overmatched American side in the game against Belgium in the round of 16 during the 2014 World Cup.

howard belgium saves

With over 100 caps, Howard is the the most decorated keeper in a long line of stalwart US goalies.

His rumored transfer to Colorado makes him the latest big name American player to return to the MLS after playing overseas, following in the footsteps of Clint Dempsey, Michael Bradley, and Jozy Altidore.

Note: volume warning. The following video was scored by someone with the same musical sensibilities as this guy (who, as it turns out, is known as the doof warrior).

doof warrior


Sources close to Howard indicate that the deal is worth in excess of $2 million annually, which would easily make him the highest paid goalie in the MLS.

Potential MLS suitors balked at Howard’s initial demands for a contract that would pay him $5 million per year but you know what they say, “Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss you’ll land among the stars.”

Though he’s getting a little long in the tooth, goalies have a longer shelf life than regular players.

At 36, Howard’s got another World Cup in him, provided he can get off Jurgen Klinsmann’s shit list (for taking a year off) before Russia 2018.