If These Football Stars Were Politicians…

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Election season is upon us!

If footballing personalities were political candidates, who would be who?

Let me preface this by saying that no one in soccer is as bad as politicians.

But if figures from world football were politicians, this is how it would shake out:



When you think of arrogant, delusional asshole, there’s only one personality in world football that comes to mind…


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Jose Mourinho.

He’s incredibly insecure and is incapable of admitting he’s made a mistake



Hillary Clinton comes off as an out of touch, self-centered, power monger who desperately wants to be number one. Who else do you know like that?


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Cristiano Ronaldo.

He’s probably a nice guy in real life, but on TV he comes across as a total douche.



Bernie Sanders is an old fashioned, salt of the earth, take no shit from anybody kinda guy, just like his doppleganger.


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SEE ALSO: It Will Be An Insult To Fergie’s Legacy If United Give In To Zlatan’s Demands


Sir Alex Ferguson.

He’ll shoot a fair one with you any day of the week. He might not win, but it’ll be a clean fight, god dammit.



Some may consider Ted Cruz one of the creepiest people on the planet, his daughters included.


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Marc Wilmots is in the unfortunate position of looking a lot like Ted Cruz.

In his native Belgium, known as the Bull of Dongleberg.

Well, there’s only two things that come from Texas…



Election Day

We’ve got a lot of quality candidates here. One of these people will be your leader for the next 4-8 years, so choose wisely.


Who ya votin for?

Mr. Kissy


These Hands

The Dongleberry