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Football lacks class, so it was no surprise that more or less when the full-time whistle went at Wembley, signalling Manchester United’s FA Cup success, social media was awash with substantial talk that Jose Mourinho was in and Louis van Gaal was out of Old Trafford.
All that talk may well prove to be inaccurate, though, should Ed Woodward be unable to find his pen:
“I know I left it round here somewhere, Jose. Give me a second to locate it, and then you can sign the contract.”
Sources close to the two parties have told us that the ‘Special One’ did offer to use the pen he had on him – he also pointed to the several pens sitting at Woodward’s desk. However, the Manchester United Executive Vice-Chairman was adamant it had to be *that* pen.
“No, no. That simply isn’t a viable alternative.
“This pen is one of those cool ones with various colour options.
“So, one pen, one nib but eight different colour options. The mind boggles, really.
“Sorry, Mr Jose, it’s protocol we use that.”
As of this current moment, the pen’s whereabouts is still a mystery but Louis van Gaal was said to be leaving Wembley in a particularly smug mood for someone who had just been sacked.
Ed Woodward is currently waiting to be picked up by his mum, so they can go back and search his bedroom for the missing pen.
More to follow as we get it…