Roy Hodgson’s a forward-thinking man, apparently.
Just because he’s been sitting about watching football for two years since the last World Cup, that doesn’t mean Hodgson has neglected his preparations for Euro 2016 in France this summer.
The godfather of English football has revealed his final 23, leaving at home Premier League champion Danny Drinkwater, Newcastle super-sub Andros Townsend, and Fabian Delph – thankfully, the nation were saved from Roy taking the Man City man to France due to injury.
That means Jack Wilshere, Daniel Sturridge and Jordan Henderson will all be on the plane. Good one, Roy.
Hodgson has no doubt taken the necessary precautions, though, and has booked out an entire hospital for his three favourite walking wounded, for when they inevitably get injured after just looking at a football.
To be fair, maybe he thinks England aren’t going to win it anyway, so everyone might as well have a bit of a laugh while they’re at it – Tom Heaton is basically going on a stag do?!
Jack Wheelchair is the odds-on favourite to bottle the tournament first, so Hodgson wants to make sure he’s got plenty of lovely French nurses looking after him should the worst happen.
Wilshere will be given his own phone so he can text Drinkwater, who’ll be playing roughly about the same amount of football as him (at least in his back garden) – it’s great that they can keep each other company.
Hodgson has taught us all a valuable lesson here, and that is players shouldn’t be foolish enough to win the Premier League, but instead just limp about on the sidelines for most of the season; before miraculously reappearing with two games to go just before the Euro 2016 squad announcement.
Oh, and be Hodgson’s friend. Lesson learnt, Danny Drinkwater.