Mapfre Stadium in Columbus, Ohio is the USMNT’s version of the Alamo. It’s an American stronghold that is called upon in times of need in order to get the W against the invading Mexican National Team.
The USMNT has never lost in Columbus in 11 games at the Crew Stadium with a record of 8-0-3; we simply don’t lose in Columbus.
The CONCACAF Hexagonal, or qualifying for the 2018 World Cup, starts this fall and the US hosts Mexico in the second round of games at no other than Mapfre Stadium. Why fuck with fate?
Here’s the lineup that should be starting in the Hexagonal for the USMNT:
The Secretary of Defense is the best option at GK right now. He's playing well and actually getting regular minutes unlike Guzan. His experience lets him keep his spot in net. Source: Twitter
The pacy right back fortunately moved to Newcastle from Tottenham in the summer. Yedlin easily keeps his spot in the Starting XI, some work could be done on his crossing ability though. Source: Twitter
American Hero. The young center back for Hertha Berlin is talented in the air and dangerous on set pieces. His upbringing in the Bundesliga displays his ability to play out of the back and keep possession. Maybe the US can play proper football. Source: Twitter
Cameron has experienced a rough start to the new Premier League season with Stoke City, but should be able to steady the ship for the Potters. His leadership, presence, and skill makes him a good pairing for Brooks. Source: Twitter
Although I find him to be a better attacker than defender, Fabian Johnson provides a lot going forward for the US in attack. His pace and technical ability allows for quality services and the occasional banger. Source: Twitter
Our captain and trusty servant. Michael Bradley has quite a few haters for his inability to show up in big tournaments, but Bradley will lead the US through qualifying and man that deep lying midfield role. Source: Twitter
The man with the 'stache has been balling out in the MLS and quite frankly deserves to be the league MVP. His ability to combine in midfield and slip forwards in is best in the side. His impact will determine how well the US does going forward. Source: Twitter
Not in the best form at the moment, but Nagbe deserves a slot in the midfield next to Kljestan. His ability to change a game and get through the seams to finish will be important against tough opposition. Source: Twitter
The prodigal son. Christian Pulisic has started the new season for Dortmund on a high and continues to grow as a footballer. At 18, his confidence is through the roof and his one v one to provide service is second to none on the roster. He has earned his spot in this lineup. Source: Twitter
The US needs to exploit Jozy Altidore's recent run of form and pray it continues before he gets injured. The big striker is one of the most prolific scorers in US history and the goals keep coming the USMNT will be hard to stop in qualifying. Source: Twitter
Bobby Wood secured a big move from the second division in Germany to the Bundesliga and continues to do what he does best, get buckets. The young striker might need to play out wide until he unseats Altidore in that central role, but this is another young, bright spot for the US. Source: Twitter
When the USMNT plays in Columbus, you best believe that Dos a Cero (or 2-0) is on every American’s mind. On 8 different occasions, the US has beaten Mexico on a two-nil scoreline in games ranging from friendlies to the 2002 World Cup. That scoreline is ours.
The Mexican national team is struggling after facing a disappointing summer where so much hope and excitement for the Copa America turned to shit when Chile pillaged their backline and goal for 7 in the quarterfinals.
Eduardo Vargas and company ignored Mexico saying Uncle and continued to beat down the CONCACAF giant.
Now, Juan Carlos Osorio is dealing with the embarrassment of defeat as and is on thin ice – another edition of Dos a Cero and the Mexican coach might be out of a job.
With one of the strongest rosters in North America, playing Mexico is not going to be an easy task, but taking care of business in Columbus is an American duty for these players like watching American football on Sundays, paying taxes, and obligatorily drinking shitty American beer.
Cheers, Bud Light.
Jurgen Klinsmann has a task with the USMNT, but recent results have the team playing cohesively, meaning that a win against Mexico in the Hex should be doable.
With Christian Pulisic and Sacha Kljestan in the lineup with a rejuvenated Jozy Altidore, who knows, we might actually finish top of the qualifying table (as we fucking should).
Maybe Klinsmann should bring Landon Donovan into the roster for solidarity, he just loves playing against Mexico.
The US has a date with history in Columbus. Be ready Mexico, Columbus isn’t falling like the Alamo.