This is a real story from real life. And I’d say this is not an episode of Jackass, but obviously Knoxville and company were not pussy asses who bling their attorney’s hotlines when they get hit by a Porta-Potty.
Brian Berg, which sounds like the name of a guy who would get run over with a rectangular container of human feces, was playing 18 at Fox Run Golf Links in Illinois last summer. Berg was apparently admiring a six-iron approach shot (GREAT detail from Chicago 5), when, oh shit, a portable toilet on a forklift ran him over, according to a lawsuit filed in Cook County Circuit Court last week. What?
Again, this is real life. The forklift driver was driving “blind” as a Porta-Potty “completely obscured his view,” according to the suit. And while Berg was going full Tour Sauce and watching his precisely struck iron head for the green, the potty driver mowed him down.
Like, you didn’t hear it coming, bro? Apparently not, and according to the suit, the shitter really messed Berg up; knocking him unconscious, injuring his shoulder, cracking a rib and bruising his leg.
The suit alleges the forklift driver was driving “with complete and utter indifference to the probability that a golfer would be in the path of a porta-potty,” according to the negligence suit, which claims the course “uses unsafe means and methods of transporting toilets.”
But we would allege that Berg was “golfing with complete and utter indifference to the probability that a Porta-Potty would be coming his way via forklift.”
Anyway, Berg is suing the Elk Grove Park District, which owns and operates Fox Run, and the employee who was driving the fork for more than $50,000 in damages. So, yeah.