What will shock you more than Diego Costa only turning 28 on his birthday – come on, the bloke looks like he’s been through two World Wars and a divorce – was the present the Spanish striker’s teammates got him.
We’ll ignore that fact the birthday boy thought about blowing out a raging candle flame, and that the cake looks like a mix between a confused pizza topping, sprinkled with some Haribo.
Aside from the cake, the strangest gesture from the Chelsea striker’s international teammates was the brand-new LG laptop?! What? Seriously, that seems an odd gift. Surely the 48-year-old – sorry 28 – could afford a laptop/already has one?
It’s all a bit weird. Like watching your older brother open up a PlayStation 4 on his 15th birthday, despite your mum and dad suggesting that they wouldn’t be able to afford it this year.
Perhaps the old boy just fancied some extra Netflix and chill time, as the striker is without his usual Chelsea and Spanish colleague, Cesc Fabregas, following the midfielder’s omission from the Spanish squad.
Regardless of why Costa did or didn’t ask for the gift, poor old Yaya Toure would have settled for just the cake on his big day.
The birthday antics must have put a spring in the Chelsea man’s step, as he found the net in Spain’s 2-0 victory in the World Cup Qualifier over Albania.
The Spaniard’s are now joint top of Group G with Italy, on seven points, following the pair’s 1-1 draw on Friday evening.
In other international news from the weekend, England are still totally shit, and Wales have been brought back to planet Earth following their 1-1 draw with Georgia.
Life goes on, the grass is still green and Diego Costa is one-year closer to his pension.