Throughout the history of the Premier League there has been some truly shite players on display, meanwhile there are others that simply don’t do anything to earn their paycheck. This list features a bit of both, highlighting players who are stealing a living from the beautiful game.
Now that isn’t to say some of these blokes haven’t had their moments, but they’re about as rare as somebody complimenting Joey Barton. It just doesn’t happen.
Does Memphis have a twin brother with footballing deficiencies we don't know about? Because it sure as shit has looked like they've traded places since he arrived at Old Trafford. The thought of how much this fella is on every week is a shudder-inducing thought, and he'll run back to Holland with his tail between his legs soon enough.
Honest to god, Chelsea were probably pissing themselves when they got £8million for this guy! The defender has been diabolical so far this season, and at times has looked like he couldn't defend an effort from Stephen Hawking. It wouldn't come as a shock to discover that he gets completely ripsnorted before every game at this stage.
Phil Bardsley does indeed still play professional football - well in training and the odd League Cup game.
The defender has travelled from club to club trying to find a home, and with all the international talent currently residing at the Britannia it's fair to say he isn't the first name on the team sheet.
Fair play, though, probably has a fucking massive house.
Here are some things you could've done with the money City spent on Mangala - buy 7,000,000 bags of jaffa cakes, 10 beaches or a 62-bedroom house in New Zealand.
Currently managing to steal a living in two places, whilst Man City pay his wages during his loan spell with Valencia.
Cocky. Out of shape. Bit of a prick. All good ways to describe Saido Berahino, a man who doesn't know how lucky he was.
The forward is gifted with natural ability and flair, yet decided to piss it down the drain and now finds himself rotting away at The Hawthorns. It couldn't have happened to a nicer guy, and hopefully his fall from grace sees him plummet to the Conference and beyond.
The defender was easily one of the league's worst players last season, and nowadays he spends his time on the bench - definitely best place for him.
This could be a list of 70 players let alone just seven, but these are some of the extreme examples of how far this game has come in terms of paying extraordinary amounts of money to those who wouldn’t look out of place working at a One Stop.