When was the last time you were genuinely amazed by a figure that was mentioned in football? When Arsenal sold Nicola Anelka for £23million? Fernando Torres moving to Chelsea for the equivalent of 16,666,666 Tesco meal deals? Or perhaps it was more recent, a la Graziano Pelle becoming the sixth highest paid player in the world at £260,000-a-week?
Whatever your answer, the fact the money in the (not so) beautiful game is so far removed from day-to-day life, it makes it feel like Monopoly money – side note: Nan, if you’re reading this, you aren’t being the banker again on Christmas Day.
The latest nonsensical story involving large sums of undeserved money, of course, has Cristiano Ronaldo at the centre of it. And one of his many arch-rivals, Barcelona’s, out his depth, Neymar.
According to Spanish news outlet, El Confidencial, Panini America, for some reason, agreed a deal with Neymar, for46,625 Euros for signing 600 of their overpriced cards – assuming 568 of them were of Paddy McNair, given the regularity of that muppet in the Euro 2016 sticker books – equating to 78-euros-per-card.
Ronaldo, naturally, signed a deal that trumped the Barcelona forward, with CR7 defacing 1,000 trading cards and four collector’s editions, for 163 euros per card.
So whilst two of the biggest footballers in the world earn thousands for writing their name a few times. I’m bringing in last night’s dinner for lunch at work, to economise.