Video alleges that four top golfers tried to cheat on their girlfriends

They were stationed at the bar when the monumental mistake was made. You won’t be surprised to hear Rickie Fowler was complicit in orchestrating the salacious intentions of these talented millennials. It was agreed, flanked by Smylie Kaufman and Justin Thomas, Jordan would make his move on four women who sat across the bar.

Unfortunately we were only able to obtain footage of the actual approach. We rely on the testimony of the young women caught up in this awkward exchange. Their answers tell us a lot about the depraved nature of these young golfers: “Jordan Spieth is really into choking” she said, “he wouldn’t stop talking about being the ‘master’, or something along those lines, he was obsessed.” Truly harrowing stuff.

More updates to follow. We suspect this is a potentially toxic revelation for all concerned.