A first date is a bit like a lottery, isn’t it? Sometimes you meet with someone and are bowled over by them. Other times you wish you’d stayed at home with your Gilmore Girls boxed set. Of course, if you do end up on a date with a cute guy you don’t want to blow it (or maybe you do! See what I did there?) So here are things that really should be avoided if you want to see date number 2, guys!
This is the first on my list for a very good reason. Sure if you are a “top” you probably want to end up with a “bottom” but that isn’t a first date discussion. Straight guys don’t ask women if they do anal on their first date! Well, most don’t! It’s just something you need to get to in time. And anyway sexual relationships are about exploring each other. Why take out the fun and mystery before you have even got to that point?
He’s your Ex for a reason. He may have beaten you like a government mule. He may have had a penis so small he made Donald Trump look like he’s packing the Eiffel tower in his jock. But your potential new partner doesn’t need to know any of that. Sure these things come out as you get to know each other. But hearing about other guys you have been with is a turn-off. Don’t do it!
Your life story
Anecdotes are great. A funny tale or two is brilliant. Talking passionately about your favourite song/film/book is wonderful. What we don’t want to know is your entire family tree, every birthday present you have had since you were three (unless presented in a really amusing way) or about the nasty colon operation you had when you were twelve. On a first date, less is more. Drip feed info to get the guy invested. When that happens even the mundane stories seem great!
We all have them. Personally, I’m addicted to Coca-Cola. The problem is that maybe your particular vice has some associations. Sure you might love a Gin and Tonic, but do you want your potential boyfriend to think you’re an alcoholic? You may smoke a bit of weed, but with that comes the (perhaps unfair) association of laziness. They can find this stuff out organically through being with you. Don’t put them off before they get to see what you are all about. You have to get the fish on the hook before you reel it in!
It’s your first date! You know virtually nothing about this dude. Do not mention the future. That’s a conversation for…well for the future. Nothing is going to send someone running for the hills quicker than you discussing the fact you want to adopt two kids and get married young. And if the other person doesn’t get put off by that…I’m sorry I can only call it crazy talk….then they are probably a psycho! Abort! Abort!
They will be flattered that you want to impress them. They will probably want to impress you too. But they simply don’t believe that you were Michael Jackson’s choreographer and you filmed him having sex with Macaulay Culkin! Sure you may have the odd claim to fame but most guys will smell bull shit from four blocks away. Be interesting, yes, but be genuine. There are fewer turnoffs greater than dishonesty! If you are going to tell fibs from date number one what does that say about the future? For me, it says there isn’t one!